I saw my first white guy with sagging pants the other day.  A tall skinny dude with a lot of hair and a beret on top.  I suppose he thought that letting us see his bright red boxers made him look like some kind of hipster; but really, the only thing he looked was ridiculous.

In a roundabout way, though, that comical sight made me think of white guys and hoodies and a story that a friend once told me that really brings home the point I make about jumping to conclusions.  

My friend’s niece was in town for a few days.  Recently engaged, she dutifully called her aunt, saying that she wanted to come by and introduce her fiancé.  The aunt – my friend, who is Jewish – invited the newly betrothed couple for Saturday brunch where she laid out what was surely a sumptuous array of bagels, lox, various toppings, fruit, coffee and tea.  In walked the fiancé, wearing…you guessed it…a hoody.  During the afternoon, he said little, ate only an orange, and never, ever took off his hood.  My friend and her husband were perplexed and deeply concerned:  The niece was so vivacious and smart, what was she doing with this “sullen,” “rude” and surely not too bright man?

The answer came the following day, when the niece called to thank her hosts for a lovely afternoon.   When my friend commented that the fiancé didn’t seem to have eaten anything, the niece explained that he was Orthodox and kept kosher.  The only thing he could eat was the orange.  In fact, she went on, finding himself without anything to cover his head – we’re still not sure how that happened – he felt it was necessary to keep his hood on the entire afternoon.  As for his lack of conversation, well, turns out he’s just plain shy.  Giant sigh of relief!

If my friends could be so wrong about this guy, imagine what people are thinking when the face peeping out through the hood is one of a million shades of brown.  Hey, I know it’s getting chilly out there, but if you don’t want to be taken for a criminal, how about wearing a nice knit cap?  And for heaven’s sake, unless you're an Orthodox Jew, take whatever is on your head off when you’re inside!